50 Shades of HR: Part II
Part I of this story walked you through the mind of an HR. Part II will be closer to your heart, provided you aren't an HR professional. If you are an HR - the seat belt sign has been turned on, please fasten your seat belt as we might experience some turbulence!
Disclaimer: Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Or is it?
What the workforce thinks of the HR department
You've got Mail
I was supposed to stay away from you. Why are you calling me?
Paycheck
Well, I got the paycheck, but where's the money?
Social Network
Not sure if you are our source of information, or are we yours?
The Devil Wears Prada
You told me I was the one for this job. What happened?
Swimming with Sharks
I might not be perfect, but why you so mean?
Top Secret
Why is everything you tell me always a top secret? How do I contribute to grapevine now?
Catch Me If You Can
It wasn't about my performance, but just another tick on your hiring checklist, isn't it?
Lost in translation
I complained about my manager to you and you had to take it up with your boss. We are never going to be the ones in the driving seat, are we?
The Joker
Why do you think my appraisal is a thing to play with?
Horrible Bosses
What happened to the - "We don't care about what time you come and go as long as the job is done"?
Mission Impossible
So my manager came to you about my performance issues. You know how managers are, you don't have to always side with them!
O Brother, Where Art Thou?
You told me this year my appraisal would compensate for the last 10 years and I put my trust in you. What is this number?
The usual suspects
We know you are the usual suspects, how do we team up against the higher ups?
Monsters Inc
Can we leave the bird's eye view to Big Brother and Bigg Boss?
Shutter Island
This place does not fulfil my needs anymore. Please do not give me a counter-offer or impose a mandatory notice period.
Up in the air
We get you are a people's person and not necessarily a technology person. But spare the laptop keys, there are better ways to blow off some steam.
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly
How many faces and how many phases? Why does internal restructuring, cost cutting and transformation never come to an end?
Get Out
You really want to tell me you value me, after the last merit round?
Cruel Intentions
Please clear this once and for all - are we or are we not friends?
Jobs
I heard about the upcoming layoffs, let me ask you this straight up,
The Intern
You are entertaining nonetheless with all your funny quirks and we look forward to meeting you (as long as you don't bring along a big white envelope)!
Terminator
I saw the surprise mail invite. My bags are packed, I am ready to go!
Angry Birds
We know the entire world unloads their problems on you and that drives you insane, but please, spare your devices!
Little Miss Sunshine
You are generally walking around the floors with a bright smile plastered on your face ( and a slight smirk that you try hard to contain). You look like a puppy when you are sad though and that worries us (gives us anxiety)!
Life of Pi
Jokes and real-life situations apart, we love you and value the fights you fight for us and the oceans you cross for us!